Suck This

Zoltan bez Kalhoty

Well OK then maybe I don't speak English so good well I mean it's possible but well what I believe anyhow is I can speak it good enough to understand what's happening to me which is more than about ninetynine percent of the people who are exposed to it I mean that's the way the evidence looks from my perspective that's all I want to say so anyway well OK then let's talk about the Web because that's about the only subject of conversation which might still get a flicker of interest from the world out there as far as I can see and what I want to say about that is this which is it's all an illusion boys and girls it's just the vacuum cleaner of the soul that's what it is it's like switching on the TV because you might think it's all about powering up or something but it's just another way of saying COME AND GET ME I'M YOURS every single time you click or double click or whatever it is you do because if you think that immobilizing yourself in front of a system which unites ten thousand million morons by fibre optic cables is doing you any kind of good well all I can say is I hope you're not looking for anything more constructive than sympathy because that's right boys and girls all those adverts are aimed at you and nobody else but you and you might think you're special and different and everything but it's all about mass production and standardization and consumerizationalism and all the rest of the sad old familiar old sea of troubles so don't bother trying to rationalize it or excuse it or anything because that happy little electronic hum you're so used to you can't even register it any more is really and truly screaming at the top of its electronic lungs and what's it screaming boys and girls it's screaming FUCK OFF AND DIE YOU IDIOTS because it doesn't have any other plans for you right now because you're just a digit in the digital age and if you can't work out what I mean by that then just take a look at one of those pages that says this site has been visited by 54893 people since last Thursday with a happy little virtual smile and well now that 3 right there is you and I don't know what you look like or what you're wearing or anything and I mean just looking at it from the point of view of statistics and probablities and averages and that kind of stuff you probably think you look kind of special but let me fill you in in case you still don't get it as far as the Web is concerned you're just exactly as different as 3 is from 2 or 4 and that's it so don't go getting any fancy ideas about yourself because like I say it's just an illusion and a slice of fantasy that isn't even your very own home-made fantasy but just a slice of pre-packaged Pizza Hut kind of fantasy wrapped in cling film and sprinkled with food dye and synthetic flavouring which says hey you look pretty cool in your consumer products Jack or Jill or whatever your name might be well OK then now we've got that straight it's about time you faced up to some cold hard realities and post-conceptualism is about the best place to start so that's right let's face it I don't know how long you personally have been trying to come up with something that you can really and truly call your own in the ideas department because let's face it you're a non-starter if you're reading this as far as fresh emotions are concerned aren't you and well just accept it is my advice about that but anyway when it comes to ideas I suppose you might still have some kind of myth or fantasy of ownership but it's all just part of being brought up with all those corporations and the Federal Reserve and all that stuff and just try and understand one thing if you can which is that it's all just LIES you never had an original idea in your life you're just behaving like that because you've been programmed to behave like that and it's just like thinking you're an individual because you choose what kind of Nike shoes you're going to wear or whether it's going to be a Big Mac or a Double Cheese I mean that's what you're supposed to think or maybe think is too strong a word for it that's how you're supposed to feel about it anyway but as you've probably noticed it's been getting harder and harder to maintain the fiction that any of these thoughts or feelings that you have are really and truly yours in the first place and well when we get right down to it the only reason that there really is for you to feel that way the only real and true and legitimate reason which is not an illusion I mean is that it makes it much more convenient for people who own supermarkets if you think that way because I mean that's the standard way that people are supposed to feel and think if that's what we're going to insist on calling it so that the shelves get emptied in the most cost-effective manner and well you can try agonizing about it but all that means probably is that you're selecting a different range of products to express your dissatisfaction and well OK then what are we going to do about all this boys and girls I'll tell you the way I feel about it I feel you should just face the facts and GIVE UP not exactly because it's impossible to be an individual because it isn't I mean let's face it we still have the same basic equipment to start off with as Leonardo or Beethoven or whoever you might choose just so long as it's not some bullshit media creation but the cruel truth is that unless you're a lot weirder than you think you are then it's almost certainly too late by now and you've already for all practical purposes decided that you're just going to be another rat in the labyrinth and the only thing you're going to be interested in from here on in is the location of the cheese so well that's right that's what all those colourful little adverts are doing flashing away at you in the corners and hey that's right it's time.